


The Kissing Booth

by lostin_space



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Depression, Homelessness, Kissing Booths, Light Sex Work, M/M, Miscommunication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:55:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22782112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostin_space/pseuds/lostin_space
Summary: When Michael gets a surprise kissing during a kissing booth, he becomes obsessed with finding his mystery man.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 123
Kudos: 302





	1. Chapter 1

“Why am I being blindfolded?”

“ _Because_ I don’t want you judging the girls that come to kiss you,” Isobel said, “They’re paying good money and I don’t want them feeling offended if you aren’t treating everyone equally for superficial reasons.”

“I feel like a prostitute,” Micahel grumbled but sat patiently as Isobel made sure his hair looked perfect by using her wand to fix any loose curls.

“Hey, that’s a respectable profession,” Isobel scolded. He cracked a smile. “But, seriously, you’re the ideal person for this kissing booth. You don’t go to our school, so girls are going to be drawn to you and give more money.”

“Drawn to me?” Michael asked.

“Yeah, like, because you’re a bad boy,” she said, snorting as if that was the funniest thing in the world, “Your reputation precedes you, my dear brother.”

“So, basically, the rich girls you go to school with are going to use daddy’s money to kiss a guy daddy would never approve of?” he asked. Isobel smiled and patted his cheek.

“I knew you were smart,” she praised. He grinned wider.

“So, just girls then?” he clarified. Isobel rolled her eyes.

“It’s Atherton High, Michael,” she said, “Everyone is too rich to entertain bisexuality.”

“Okay, so, what I’m hearing is that there are probably a lot of guys in that school that are into other guys, they just don’t tell their parents.”

“Look, we just can’t hold your kissing booth for both girls and guys without the PTA shutting it down. If you wanna go track down the gays in your free time, by all means, go crazy,” she sighed. He grinned a little wider.

“Oh, I will.”

Within the next twenty minutes, Michael was blindfolded and being led to the booth. He could hear the excited chatter of girls and did his best to smile all charming. He promised Isobel he was going to be as charming as possible to raise as much money as possible even though he wasn’t even sure what he was raising money _for._ He knew she told him, but it was too stupid for him to remember. Probably just to suck more money out of people for brand new iPads.

“There’s a ton of girls lined up,” Max said from somewhere, “You advertising his face online really helped.”

“You did _what_ with my face?” Michael asked before immediately being shushed.

“Good,” Isobel said, “The first girls already paid their $10?”

“Wait, $10 for a _kiss?”_

 _“_ Yeah, it’s all ready to go.”

Suddenly, the sun hit his face and he heard girls excitedly whispering. Michael smiled even brighter and reveled in the reaction. He was feeling more than a little confident about all of this. 

“Step right up to kiss this handsome boy from Roswell High,” Isobel announced, “Remember, ten dollars a kiss and _no touching_ outside of lips!” Michael took a deep breath and let her hand on his back push him up the window.

“Hello?” he said, laughing a little bit as he spoke to whoever might be in front of him.

“Hi,” a soft voice said across from him, giggles erupting from the other girls.

“I’m gonna need some help with aim, so bare with me,” Micahel said. More giggles. He wanted to praise Isobel for the ego boost.

The girl leaned in and kissed him, keeping it short and chaste as Isobel had apparently insisted upon. He didn’t mind that considering he had two hours of this ahead of him. Michael figured he’d be all kissed out by the day’s end.

He’d expected it to go downhill after a while, but he _hadn’t_ expected it to suck so bad so quickly. It took about six different girls with six different flavored mints mixing in his nose for him to be over it. But, still, Michael kept up the charm, kissing each girl and hoping he didn’t leave this situation with herpes. 

“Alright, our main man needs a break!” Isobel said after an hour. Michael sighed in thanks, going to undo his blindfold. His hands were immediately swatted away. “Do not take that off, you’ll mess up your hair and I don’t have the time to fix it again.”

“Fine, _Mom,”_ Michael teased. He felt her press a kiss to his cheek and then lead him a bit away from the booth, pushing him into a chair.

“Now, don’t move. I’m getting food for us,” she said. He groaned dramatically and leaned back into the chair. “Stop pouting or I won’t feed you.”

“That’s child neglect.”

“You’re seventeen and I’m your sister, dumbass.”

“Tell that to the court.”

“Shut up,” she laughed, “Stay put.”

Soon, he was alone in some room and blindfolded. As much as that wasn’t his favorite thing in the world, he did appreciate the kissing break. He never knew how overwhelming that many different smells could be. They should definitely have a warning about that.

“Oh, shit, sorry, wrong booth,” a soft, sweet male voice said. Michael perked up.

“No worries, all people are welcome,” Michael said.

“Yeah, I saw that line out there. You’re pretty desired.”

“What can I say? You get suspended twice and suddenly you’re a hunk.”

“Oh, I don’t know if I’d call you a hunk. I think you’re more of a bear cub in the making,” the guy teased. Michael grinned, his tongue pressing to the back of his teeth.

“Is that a gay joke?”

“Well, it’s not funny if you point it out,” he said.

“I’m bi,” Michael said before quickly realizing he hadn’t even said his name, “And Michael. My name is Michael and I am bisexual.”

The guy laughed and it might’ve been the best noise Michael had ever heard. He was beginning to consider bailing on the next hour of kissing random girls.

“If you’re bi,” the voice said, getting closer. Michael’s stomach tightened. “Then why is this only for girls?”

“My sister said I had to track down guys on my own time,” Michael said.

“Well, one found you,” the voice said, only a few steps away now. Michael tilted his head up towards him. “Ten bucks, right?”

“I think yours might be free,” Michael whispered, gripping the seat as he felt the guy lean closer.

It took no time for the guy to lean down and kiss him. He smelled and tasted a lot better than the girls before him, like a palate cleanser that made him forget all about them. He had Michael’s face in his hands, pushing his fingers into his hair. It was unreal.

Michael parted his lips and, when the guy went along with it, he pulled him closer until he was straddling his lap. The guy smiled as Michael’s hands roamed, trying to remember just how toned his body was and just how soft his skin was. He felt his face, his soft hair, and his high cheekbones. His mystery man pressed against him and kissed him deeper, drawing out a moan that he hadn’t really been expecting to give. The idea of it ending was agonizing.

Alas, it had to. The guy slowed down and pulled away with Michael’s bottom lip between his teeth. Michael tried to lean in for more, but he leaned away and stood up. He ran his fingers through Michael’s hair once more before leaning to steal one last chaste kiss. It left him shaking.

“Bye,” the guy said softly and then he was gone. Michael wanted nothing more but to run after him, ask his name, ask for his number. That was one of the best fucking kisses he’d ever had.

He only remembered he was blindfolded and had to go back to kisses that would pale in comparison whenever he heard Isobel’s footsteps enter the booth.

“Are you kidding me? How did you mess up your hair without moving?!”

He didn’t have an answer.


	2. Chapter 2

“I can’t stop thinking about him.”

“God, you’re such a sap.”

Michael ignored the pillow to the chest that Isobel threw, happily focusing on the man in his mind. It’d been hours since the kissing booth ended and Michael had kissed 50 girls after that guy, and yet he was the only one he could think about. He didn’t even know what he looked like.

“You don’t get it, Iz, he was amazing.”

“He talked to you for two seconds, made out with you, and then left, how amazing could he be?” Isobel asked. Michael just hummed. “I still can’t believe you manage to kiss a guy in the 5 minutes I left you alone. You were blindfolded and you _still_ found a guy.”

“My skills are unparalleled.”

“Shut up,” she laughed. Michael hugged the pillow tight and tried to construct a face in his mind by the way it felt. It was much harder than it sounded. He rolled onto his stomach and looked up at her.

“Do you think you could find him for me?”

Isobel scoffed, “How on Earth would I do that?”

“I think I could probably know him if I heard his voice, you know, so… Help me find guys that go to your school who it might be,” Michael suggested. Isobel rolled her eyes. “I’m serious! He had this, like, really soft voice. His hair was kinda short-ish, super soft. Had great cheekbones. Maybe he’s athletic? He had a great body.”

“Oh my God, Michael, you are insane,” she groaned. He gave her a wide smile anyway. “What if he doesn’t even go to my school?”

“He has to! He was at the fundraiser,” Micahel insisted, “Please? Please, please, please, _please.”_

“Jesus Christ, fine! I’ll try to talk to all the out guys at my school,” she caved. He almost jumped on her bed to hug her, but he decided against it since she had a gross facemask on that he wasn’t really eager to get on his shirt.

“Thank you! You won’t regret it!” 

-

“You owe me your life for this illegal shit I did for you,” Isobel said as she made her way into Bean Me Up. Michael always made it there first since it was closer to Roswell High, but they never failed to have their after-school coffee.

Where they went _after_ their after-school coffee depended on the day.

“Ooh, tell me,” Michael said excitedly. It’d been three days since the kissing booth incident and Michael was still stuck on that mystery man. But, since it was now Monday, Isobel finally had some feedback from her explorations.

“I was talking to a few out guys around school and probably coming off as super creepy, but I was talking to one and he had the high cheekbones and was kinda thin and was soft-spoken… so I recorded him,” Isobel admitted. Michael smiled widely.

“You’re the best sister I’ve ever had, let me see!” Michael insisted, leaning over to see. She pulled up a video of a guy with pale blonde hair that was shot from a very unflattering angle.

“I swear, he’s cute in person,” Isobel promised. Michael held the phone to his ear and listened to the guy talk. “Well? Is it him?”

“No,” Michael said, pausing as he listened closer, “I don’t think?”

“You don’t _think?”_

 _“_ I’m pretty sure my guy has a deeper voice,” Michael said, frowning. But, the problem was, he wasn’t sure. The guy had only spoken a few sentences and then kissed him senseless and three days had passed, so the memory of that voice was fading. “Fuck.”

“Caramel macchiato for Michael,” a barista said. Michael stood with his frown still in place.

“Look, if you don’t remember his voice, we’re kinda stuck,” Isobel said. He sighed and turned to go grab his drink, smacking straight into another body.

“Oh shit, sorry,” the guy he ran into said.

“Sorry,” Michael said at the same time, looking over the guy to make sure he didn’t spill his coffee. He was in the Atherton uniform like Isobel with his coffee safe in hand. Michael got to his face and saw his bright smile slowly fade as recognition set in. Which was wild because Michael had never seen the guy before. “Sorry, do I know you?”

“Uh…” he trailed off, “No, I don’t think so.”

For a moment, Michael wished he did. He was fucking gorgeous, tan skin and dark hair adding to his stunning face. Michael slipped on his charming smile.

“That’s too bad,” he said. The guy gulped visibly and his cheeks started tinting a little red.

“Right, well… See you around, I guess.”

Michael turned to Isobel without even getting his coffee. “Who was that?”

She rolled her eyes. “His name is Alex and, before you ask, he’s straight. You got over mystery kiss man awfully fast.”

“I’m not over him,” Michael protested, looking out the window to see Alex stopping to put his headphones in. He was even pretty from afar. “I’m just… exploring my options.”

“Yeah, well, go get my coffee, Zeus.”

“Oh, that’s just cold.”

Michael got the drink and waited a few seconds for his own drink to be finished, bringing them both to the table. Isobel grabbed her macchiato like it was a lifeline. Which, knowing her, it kind of was.

“So, like, how do you _know_ that guy is straight?” Micahel asked, his eyes drifting to the window again to see if Alex was still there. He wasn’t.

“He’s on the football team,” she answered simply. Michael raised his eyebrows.

“Are you telling me queer dudes don’t play football? Izzy, that’s just plain willful ignorance,” he said. Isobel snorted and rolled her eyes.

“Look, it’s not about him. I just spent all day talking to all the out guys in my school and I don’t know how we’re even going to find him if you don’t remember his voice,” Isobel said. Michael pursed his lips and got to thinking. There had to be _some_ way to identify him. “Is it possible he’s not out?”

“If he’s not, then it’s pretty ballsy of him to just kiss a stranger from a different school who was blindfolded and–” Michael paused as the event started sounding less sexy and more like a crime of opportunity, “I”m beginning to think he might not be out.”

“Then I don’t know what you want me to do,” Isobel said, “I can’t hunt down people and out them.”

“Well, no, but maybe if he knows that I’m looking for him, he’ll come out on his own,” Michael suggested. Isobel didn’t seem to buy it. “Listen, if I kiss him again, I’ll know it.”

“Michael. No. You can’t go kissing random guys,” Isobel scolded. He rolled his eyes.

“I can hold another kissing booth for guys!”

“If he’s not out, he’s not going to go to a kissing booth,” Isobel pointed out. Michael sighed and slumped into his seat. Before he could come up with anything, Isobel got a bit serious and leaned closer. “Where are you sleeping tonight?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Michael replied, giving his sweet smile. She eyed him but nodded without another word.

They stayed and talked for another hour and a half before Isobel had to go home. The sun was in the beginning stages of setting, the sky turning pretty shades of pink and purple. He sat in his truck in the parking lot until it got dark completely.

Then he drove to the Crashdown, parking on the side of the building as a semi-decent way to hide the fact that his truck would be there all night. He knew Mr. Ortecho had probably noticed it, but he never said anything. Michael walked in and saw Liz behind the counter. She’d gone to Roswell High through her freshman year before getting a scholarship to Atherton. Michael had been offered one once upon a time, but then he got in a couple of fights and surviving became a lot more important.

“Hey, Ortecho,” he said, walking up to the counter. Surprisingly, Alex from the coffee shop was already sitting there. Michael smiled at him. “And guy who I ran into.”

“Michael, this is Alex. Alex, this is Michael,” Liz introduced. Alex gave a two-finger salute.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Michael said, “I’ve never seen you before and now suddenly I see you twice in one day. Must be fate.” Alex’s neck and his ears slowly started turning red, his attention going to the basket of fries before him.

“Stop harassing my friends,” Liz laughed. He just grinned even wider. “Rosa’s upstairs, go around back though because my dad’s in the kitchen.”

Michael shot her a pair of finger guns. “Gotcha. See you around, Alex.”

Michael gave him one last glance before heading out the door and going around the back of the building. He quickly scaled the fire escape that led straight into Rosa Ortecho’s bedroom. He wondered how thought-out that placement was.

He felt through the window with ease, landing on a pile of clothes. Rosa was sat on her bed with a sketch pad in her lap and didn’t even look up at the commotion.

“If you break something by climbing that one day, I’m not gonna help you,” she said. He just smiled and stood up, flopping down on her bed. She kicked him, scolding him in Spanish for fucking up drawing.

“You’d help me,” he said, pulling her pillow beneath his head, “You like me too much.”

“Don’t get it twisted, I like that you punched Jake Thibodaux for grabbing my ass two years ago. Doesn’t mean I like you as a person,” she told him, but the smile on her face said otherwise. Hell, the fact that she gave him a place to stay three times a week said otherwise. He made a personal rule not to stay more than three times a week with her or the Evans’ strictly so he wouldn’t overstay his welcome. That meant only one night a week in his truck which, at this point, wasn’t the end of the world.

“So, I met a guy at the kissing booth I told you about,” he grinned. Rosa raised her eyebrow, putting her sketch pad to the side.

“Spill.”

“So I was on break and I still had my blindfold on and he came in back and kissed me. Like, really kissed me. Like, I forgot my name for a minute kissed me,” he said. Her eyes widened and she grinned, teasingly prodding his ribs with her socked foot.

“Who is he?”

“I don’t know,” Michael sighed, “I was blindfolded and he just left. And now I have no idea how to find him. All I know is he goes to Atherton.”

“Ah,” she said, her smile fading, “Then maybe you don’t want to know him.”

“Why not?”

“Most of the guys there are assholes, trust me. They think they deserve the world because of their parents being rich. They have no fucking respect for anyone,” she informed him. Michael frowned. “The only one I’ve ever met that I didn’t want to punch was Alex.”

“Oh, that guy downstairs with Liz? He’s unfairly hot.”

“He’s sheltered as hell,” Rosa said, “Sweet guy and super smart, but his dad is on his ass. His curfew is 8 PM and he’s got, like, concerningly low self-esteem. I asked him if he’d ever had a girlfriend and he’s just like ‘girls don’t like me’.”

“Maybe he’s not straight,” Michael offered. She rolled her eyes just like Isobel.

“He’s on the football team.”

“Why do you guys think that’s a straight indicator? Your gaydar is severely flawed,” he said, “He blushed when I talked to him.”

“Yeah, because he’s sheltered. He blushes when anyone talks to him.”

“Crushing my dreams one hot guy at a time.”

“Hey, your mystery kisser might not be hot.”

Michael gasped dramatically, “How dare you insult the love of my life like that?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Rosa laughed, shaking her head, “You don’t even know him.”

“I will,” Michael insisted, “I can’t pass that up.”

“Well, go to sleep and dream about him. The bags under your eyes have bags,” she said. He stuck his tongue out, but didn’t retort as he let his eyes close. He’d spent the night prior camped out behind the public library. The ladies there never checked. However, he still only got a couple of hours.

“Thanks, Rosa,” he said, kicking off his shoes. She threw her blanket over him, engulfing him in darkness and her distinct scent. He didn’t mind.

“No problem, papi.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael keeps seeing Alex wherever he goes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning that a little depression period happens in this chapter. I sort of described it the way I experience them, so it's not anything perfectly textbook. Another warning for slight sex work/unspoken transactional sex for a place to sleep. It's a hard thing to tag, but I'm trying my best!  
> stay safe ❤️️
> 
> also i know the kissing booth isn't really mentioned in this chapter but hey we gotta build on the Feels before the Reveals

"I'm thinking about making like a post on Twitter for like a public request for him to DM me."

"You could get any girl or out guy you want, why not go for someone who isn't trying to find you?" Isobel asked. Michael sighed and shrugged.

It'd been a week since he got that kiss and he was dreaming of it still. Maybe he was lonely, maybe he was desperate, but he couldn't shake the feeling of how wanted he'd felt at that moment. The more he thought about it, the more he thought it had to be on purpose. The guy had commented on the line, he'd seen him. He wanted him so badly that he pushed his luck. Michael wanted that person in his life.

“I just... I want him,” he said. Isobel sighed and dropped her hand into his hair. 

“Isobel, do you‒” Anne Evans said as she walked into the room, pausing once she spotted him.

"Hi, Mrs. Evans," Michael said, giving her a kind smile. He liked Mrs. Evans as much as he could like the woman who adopted the other two children he was found with but not him. She now let him stay over all the time, though, so he couldn’t complain. 

“Hi, Michael,” she said, “Isobel, can I speak to you for a minute?”

Michael sat up as Isobel groaned and obeyed. He watched hesitantly as they disappeared out of view before crawling towards the door to eavesdrop. 

“What did I say?”

“Mom, you know he doesn’t have anywhere to go.”

“That is not my responsibility.  _ You  _ are. If you were so insistent about letting him come over, you should’ve kept your grades up.”

“It was one D!”

“And you know what happens if you get another one? Your GPA drops and you’re put on probation. We pay a lot of money to make sure you and your brother get a good education. You need to be studying, not playing with the neighborhood boy.”

“I will study, Mom, but don’t make him leave. He can stay in Max’s room.”

“I’m not rewarding you for doing bad in school.”

“Don’t punish Michael for my bad grade!” 

Michael left out the window before he could listen to the rest of the conversation. The last thing he wanted to be was a burden.

So, he got in his truck and headed towards the library. He couldn’t bring himself to go back to the Ortecho’s for at least a couple more days, Rosa had to be tired of sharing her bed with him for so many nights in a row.

He went inside and waved at the lady up front. Michael was there often whenever he had nothing else to do. Reading books in a homey place was much better than sitting in his car for hours. Plus, he could charge his phone and do homework. Anything to pass the time.

Michael weaved through the aisles of books, looking for anything that might pass the time. He scanned the true crime section for awhile. When he looked up, though, he found a familiar face just a few steps away.

“It is really impossible to stop running into you,” Michael commented, pulling on his smile as he walked towards Alex. Clearly, whatever was watching over him decided he needed a place to sleep tonight and chose Alex’s bed.

Alex looked over to him and smiled. He seemed a lot more confident now that no one else was around, that blush on his cheeks nowhere in sight. Michael grinned even wider and turned his charm up a couple of notches.

“I guess it is,” Alex retorted. Michael huffed a laugh and dragged his tongue over his bottom lip. Alex watched him. Right,  _ straight. _

Michael stepped closer. “What are you up to tonight?”

“Nothing,” Alex said, “Curfew.” Michael made a wounded noise.

“That’s no fun.”

Alex scoffed with a smile, shaking his head. It was too easy to see how gorgeous he was. His hair was black and messy against tanned skin and dark eyes. He looked sweet and untouched. It was hard not to be drawn to him because of it.

“I’m not stupid, I know who you are,” Alex said which definitely caught Michael off guard. Instead of showing that, though, he just tilted his head to the side and waited. “Roswell’s biggest slut.”

“Oh, you wound me,” Michael pouted, letting it slip into a laugh as he pressed his hand to his heart. That wasn’t new knowledge. Girls liked him, boys liked him, anyone in between or otherwise liked him. He was always safe so he didn’t see why it mattered.

“You are the only out guy in Roswell,” Alex added. Michael shrugged.

“Yeah.”

“Ballsy,” Alex commented. Michael breathed slow and made a point to look him up and down. When he got back to his face, Alex was grinning.

“What are you gonna do about it?”

Alex stared at him for a moment, licking his lips. God, those  _ lips.  _

“I have a curfew. See you around,” Alex answered, sliding past him. Their shoulders brushed together and Michael turned to watch him go. He was more sure than ever that Alex wasn’t straight. There was no way.

That night, Michael bundled up in the bench seat of his truck and dreamed that maybe his mystery kiss looked like Alex.

-

“I’m so sorry, Michael,” Isobel said as they sat for coffee the next day. He shook his head, waving his hand.

“You’re fine, I understand,” Michael insisted. She still frowned and bought his coffee.

They sat and talked for a while, her prodding about where he slept the night before. He didn’t give her an answer. She would throw a fit if she knew.

“If you need help studying, I can help. I’m good at math,” Michael offered. She shook her head and sipped her coffee.

“I don’t need help. I understand the material, it was literally a pop quiz that she gave the  _ day after  _ she introduced the topic. Like, half the class failed. Mom’s just being ridiculous,” she grumbled. 

“How long you think it’ll be until she lets me come back over?” Michael asked. Isobel looked guilty all over again.

“I don’t know. I feel like shit,” she sighed. He just shook it off and decided to completely change the subject.

“So, I think that Alex guy is into me,” Michael said. Isobel snorted and rolled her eyes.

“He’s straight.”

“Okay, maybe, but I can  _ dream,”  _ Michael laughed. Truthfully, he was sure he had a chance, but he didn’t want to out him. That would be the first step in ruining his chances.

“Speaking of the straight boy,” Isobel said. Michael’s head shot towards the window and saw Alex decked out in running gear slowing to a stop. Watching him catch his breath covered in sweat was mouthwatering. “Close your mouth.”

“Why did you never introduce me to him before?” Michael whined.

“Because I don’t know him,” she laughed. 

Michael watched him walk in and they made eye contact. Alex gave the faintest smile before heading to the counter, his muscular thighs basically rippling in his tight shorts. Michael stared. He couldn’t help it.

“Take a picture next time,” Alex said as he walked past him to go to the other side of the counter, his voice slightly teasing. Michael felt high on it.

Before Alex left, he gave him a two-finger salute and a wink. 

“Oh,” Isobel said, “Maybe he is into you.”

-

The desert was cold at night.

Michael shivered and shivered and tried to ignore the sound of the wind against his truck. It was a painful 40 degrees and he didn’t see an end in sight. He waited until he couldn’t feel the tip of his nose before he pulled out his phone and looked through his contacts. He clicked on Tessa’s name.

“Michael Guerin,” her self-important voice said, “Why am I not surprised?”

“What are you doing tonight?” he asked, keeping his voice smooth and charming and trying his best to hide how fucking cold he was.

“Nothing,” she hummed, “Why?”

“Can I come over?” 

She let out pouty little noise. “You only call me when you want to hook up and you’re not good at hiding it.”

“What can I say? I’m a guy who knows what I want,” he said, sitting up and starting up his truck. He knew she’d say yes. “And I want you.”

She hummed happily. “Okay. I’ll unlock the window.”

“See you in a minute.”

“You better.”

Michael drove quickly, parking a few blocks down. He cupped his hands over his mouth and blew into them, warming himself up before looking in the mirror and making sure he looked alright. The bags beneath his eyes were obvious, but he didn’t expect her to notice. She never really did.

Tessa let him in and didn’t even give him a once over before bringing him in for a kiss. She tugged him to the bed and moved quickly in stripping him. He didn’t mind, basking in the warmth of another body on his.

An hour later, she was asleep and he took the opportunity to take a quick shower so he wouldn’t smell too obvious. He looked at himself in the mirror for a moment. When he didn’t recognize himself, he stopped looking.

Michael dried off as best he could before getting back in her bed. It wasn’t the best sleep he’d ever had, but it was better than nothing.

He was clean and warm and that’s all that mattered.

-

Michael sat in an empty booth in the back of the Crashdown, shooting rubber bands into a cup on the table.

Sundays were the worst.

Isobel and Max were forced to go to church and they couldn’t really hang out until after. Then, since they were being kept locked up due to one bad grade, that left an entire day of Michael being alone. The library was closed, he lost his fake ID so he couldn’t get into the bar, and life sucked. He was bored and lonely and beginning to think of what girls he could hook up with so he could get a bed to sleep in that night.

Just as he was unlocking his phone and going to Instagram, a body sat across from him.

“Come upstairs, you look horrible,” Rosa said. Michael just shrugged. “Papi, seriously, you’re scaring me. When’s the last time you ate? Where have you been sleeping?”

“I’m fine,” Michael said, flashing a smile. Rosa saw right through it. She always did.

“I’m going to make you dinner and then you’re sleeping here. It’s going to get into the 30s tonight and I want to know exactly where you are,” she scolded. He didn’t argue back, simply fixed his eyes back on the cup.

His thoughts wandered again in the few minutes she was gone. He thought about all those girls that kissed him at that kissing booth. None of them were as good as that guy, but they were all interested enough in him to  _ pay.  _ Would they let him stay over? Maybe one of them had a pool house that he could break into.

A plate landed in front of him, a pile of fries and a burger and a cup of water. He looked to where Rosa was standing beside the table with that no-nonsense look on her face. She looked almost motherly in those moments. Liz had told him in confidence once that one of the biggest reasons she never ratted them out to her dad was because Rosa was better when she focused her thoughts on caring for him rather than letting them get toxic. He didn’t know whether it was a good thing or if he was just that imposing.

“Stand up,” she ordered. He did, his body feeling heavy. He guessed he really hadn’t slept that much that weekend. She pulled him into a tight hug, cradling his head against her shoulder. “I don’t know what’s been going on in that head of yours, but stop it. I will never turn you away. Stop torturing yourself.”

For a moment, he believed her.

Rosa shoved him back down and instructed him to eat. He did and it was only then that he realized Alex had been watching him the entire time from the other side of the diner. His face was unreadable and Michael avoided it. Why did he have to see him when he was feeling so low?

Alex’s eyes were still on him when Rosa brought him upstairs. She helped him out of his coat and his dirty shirt, unbuckling his jeans and dropping them to the floor. His mind wasn’t all there as she redressed him in clean clothes.

Rosa tugged him into bed and wrapped him up, pulling his head against her chest. 

When he woke up the next morning, the day prior was fuzzy in his mind. Was it one day or was it less or was it forever? He couldn’t pinpoint. So, instead of trying, he got dressed and smiled at himself in the mirror of Rosa’s bathroom.

“You’re fine,” he said. 

-

Three days later when Michael left school, Alex was standing by his truck.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” Michael said, grinning. He was feeling better than he had the week before, he was feeling like himself. That made it easy to face Alex. The guy he’d seen a few days ago wasn’t  _ really  _ Michael. Not really.

“Yeah, well I’ve been thinking about you,” Alex said. Michael felt a bit shocked and his smile became too genuine for a moment.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” Alex said, “There’s a shed in the woods behind my house.”

Michael’s eyebrows furrowed as Alex handed him a sticky note with an address scribbled on it. “This might be the weirdest way anyone’s ever asked me to hook up.”

“I’m not asking you to hook up,” Alex said softly. Michael looked back up at him. “It’s warm, there’s blankets and a bed. I found it when I was a kid. It’s kinda hidden and kinda overgrown, but I’ve fixed it up. You’ll be safe.” Michael didn’t know whether to be insulted or thankful.

“Why?”

Alex just stared at him and took a deep breath, patting the hood of his truck.

“Let’s go get Taco Bell. My treat.”

Reluctantly, Michael agreed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know if there's any tags I should add ever! I'm still learning and i'm always here for some education!  
> HAVE FUN

It was the first morning Michael had slept in that he could remember.

The first two weeks or so of coming to this shed that Alex had shown him, he could barely sleep. He kept waiting for something to happen and that it’d be a big joke and he’d often stress so much that he’d leave early hours in the morning to sneak into Rosa’s bedroom. Last night, however, he’d passed out around two in the morning. He was wrapped up in the blankets Alex had in there on the tiny, twin mattress. It all smelled of Alex and it had kept him asleep well after the sun rose.

He stretched his arms out and smiled at the ceiling. He didn’t know what he did to deserve this, but he was thankful. Alex hadn’t come into the shed since he showed him where it was which Michael found a little odd, but they hung out other places. He’d gone to coffee with him and Isobel, they went to Alex’s football games, they talked. It was a legit friendship. Michael felt blessed.

The shed was hidden behind the house and, apparently, Alex’s family didn’t even know about it. It was old and, according to some initials carved into the wall, had been there since at least the 50s. Somehow, though, it was still connected to the house’s electricity. Alex theorized that it was probably shotty, but he hadn’t had any issues. It meant there was a space heater that worked and a light bulb strung from the ceiling.

“How’d you find this?” Michael had asked him that first day.

“I wandered a lot as a kid. I found a lot of stuff, but this felt like my little secret,” Alex had answered.

Apparently, for the last ten years of Alex’s life, he’d been slowly making this place his little escape whenever he needed to go be alone. Michael did feel a little bad that he’d sort of taken it over during the night, but he was also endlessly thankful that he  _ had  _ somewhere to go at night. There was no pressure to leave. In fact, Alex would leave food for him with mom-like sticky notes to tell him to sleep well. It was overwhelmingly kind.

Michael leaned over and grabbed his phone, seeing it fully charged and a message from Alex telling him that he was going for a run if he wanted to join that had been sent four hours prior.

_ Michael: sorry, I slept through it 😬 would've gone with you  _

_ Alex: no worries :) wanna go get coffee?  _

_ Michael: yeah, sure. Meet me at the shed? _

_ Alex: be there soon!  _

Michael bit his lip to hold back a smile. This all felt so normal. It was surreal.

Still, Michael got up and got dressed. He made the bed up like he did every day before he left. Typically, he didn't even undo it. Last night he had. 

Michael used his phone as a mirror, checking his hair and his face. He’d have to sneak into Isobel’s for a shower later, but that was manageable. He hadn’t exactly told Rosa or Isobel exactly where he was staying, but he wasn’t really sure if Alex would be okay with that. However, he figured he’d have to ask if only because he didn’t want them to worry.

When Alex got to the shed, he  _ knocked.  _ Michael’s system was flooded with a weird, giddy sensation. He knocked. Someone  _ knocked  _ as if it was  _ his  _ space. He really tried to shake off the smile when he went to open the door, but he couldn’t. It was okay, though, because Alex was smiling too.

“Sleep well?” he asked. He looked good. He always looked good. 

“Yeah,” Michael said, licking his lips and looking Alex up and down. On a Saturday morning, he’d gotten up early to run and take a shower, meaning his dark hair was glistening and his clothes were fresh and he smelled so strongly of lavender body wash that it was unfair. 

“You know you can keep some stuff in here if you want,” Alex said, “Make it feel like home.” Michael felt his stomach tie in a billion knots and his face felt hot. What the fuck was this?

“Nah, I don’t wanna impose,” Michael said, suddenly unable to really look Alex in the face, “I already feel like I’m monopolizing all the time in here.”

“Oh, fuck off, you’re so not,” Alex laughed, walking further inside. Michael watched him flop onto the bed, making sure it would smell like him for a little longer. “See? No monopolizing here.”

Michael exhaled heavily and managed a smirk, walking closer. Each day, it felt a little harder to flirt with Alex. He wasn’t sure why it was getting harder. Especially since he spent more than a couple nights flailing and smiling like an idiot because Alex did something like brush past his arm.

“So… coffee? Or you wanna stay here?” Michael asked, staring at Alex all laid out like that on the bed. He knew he wasn’t actually as clean as he would like to the first time he got Alex in bed, but it was so enticing.

Alex licked his lips and huffed a laugh, pushing himself up. “Coffee. I need it in my system.”

“Okay,” Michael laughed, resisting the urge to push him further into the bed, “Let’s go. My treat.”

“Shut up,  _ my _ treat.”

“It’s  _ always  _ your treat.”

“I don’t think you understand how much pleasure it brings me to spend my daddy’s money on a proud bisexual man,” Alex grinned, standing up and touching his chest lightly as he passed, “A subtle but satisfying rebellion if you ask me.”

Michael didn’t know how to react to that, but something deep in his stomach told him that he didn’t want it to end.

-

Alex came to the shed more often.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah.”

“How do you do it?” Alex wondered. He was laid on a yoga mat on the floor, slowly lifting his hips off the floor and holding before slowly dropping them. Michael was positively mesmerized.

“How do I do what?” he asked, tilting his head just a little so he could probably examine Alex’s ass. When he was flat on the floor, Michael theorized he could fit his hand between his back and the floor. He thought about trying.

“Act like nothing bothers you all the time,” Alex said, “Like, I’ve seen you literally look like you’re about to shut down and then the minute someone comes up to you, you throw on that sexy little smile and pretend like you’re great.”

“Sexy, huh?” Michael asked. Alex scoffed and gave him a pointed look.

“Not the point.”

Michael sighed and looked down at the book in his lap. It was apparently in English, but with Alex looking like  _ that  _ only a few feet away he couldn’t recognize any of the words. He tried to come up with a good response but couldn’t think of one.

“I just do,” Michael said with a shrug, “It’s not that deep.”

“I think it’s a coping mechanism,” Alex said sharply, swiftly moving from that position to a plank. His biceps were bulging and it truly felt like he was doing this on purpose.

“I’m not a psychology project.”

“Didn’t say you were,” Alex said, not even kind of sounding winded, “Just saying I think that’s why you’re so tired all the time. You drain yourself pretending.”

“I’m not  _ pretending. _ ”

“Maybe not necessarily,” Alex said, bringing himself down to the mat, “But on some level, it’s not real.”

Michael breathed in slow, trying not to be offended. He didn’t think Alex was trying to offend him. Alex lifted chest up and turned his face towards the sky, his hips to the ground. Michael clutched his book and brought his knees to his chest.

“Okay, your turn,” Alex said.

“What?”

“I clearly upset you. Your turn to psychoanalyze me.”

Michael stared at him and wondered if he should play the queer card, maybe that would hit as deep as saying  _ hey your whole personality is fake.  _ Instead, he pulled on his bottom lip and shook his head.

“I got nothing,” he said.

“C’mon,” Alex prodded, shooting a grin his way, “Something’s in your head.”

Michael waited for a few beats before speaking.

“Why are you so nice to me?” Michael asked softly. Alex furrowed his eyebrows and relaxed, sitting down like a normal person.

“Not everyone has an agenda, Guerin,” he said with a soft laugh that Michael couldn’t reciprocate.

“Not in my experience.”

Alex stared at him for a moment before saying, “What about Rosa? She doesn’t have an agenda.”

“Rosa feels bad for me and I’m just waiting until she hates me,” Michael said, “Same with you, I guess.”

“Okay, Rosa literally loves you,” Alex corrected. Michael shrugged. “And I won’t ever hate you. If I thought that was a possibility, I wouldn’t be around you in the first place. I definitely wouldn’t have asked you to stay here.”

It was the first real-time those exact words had been said out loud. They were the scariest words Michael had ever heard. He didn’t respond.

“You look tired,” Alex said, standing up, “Get some sleep.”

Michael stayed up the rest of the night.

-

“My dad’s out of town.”

Michael watched Alex curiously as he stood in the doorway of the shed. He was in baggy sweatpants and an equally baggy crop top, his hair a mess and looked painfully sexy. It genuinely wasn’t fucking fair. Michael gulped and took a quick look at him up and down. Alex was smirking when he got back to his face.

They’d been doing this for a month. He told Isobel and Rosa where he’d been staying and they didn’t ask questions, but he knew they thought he was just setting himself up to be let down. They had told him more than a few times that Alex was straight, don’t fall for a straight guy, don’t, don’t, don’t.

But they didn’t see Alex in moments like this. Moments when he smirked at him and touched him and wanted to be around him. He couldn’t just be making that shit up.

“I have the whole house to myself,” Alex added after a moment.

“Sounds lonely,” Michael said. Alex bit down on his lip and nodded.

“Yeah,” he said. Alex tapped against the door frame and tilted his head, truly looking at Michael in a way he’d never really been looked at. It made his heart beat a little faster. “You need a haircut.”

Michael let out a surprised little laugh, raking his hand through his hair. It  _ was _ getting long and Rosa usually cut it, but he hadn’t really been paying attention. He’d been a little distracted.

“I’ll get one eventually.”

Alex grinned. “I can give you one.”

“Right, and ruin my hair? Nice try.”

“Nah, I’m actually pretty good at it,” Alex promised, reaching forward to swat lightly at his arm, “Let me show you.”

Michael caved. How could he not?

“Alright, but not too short in case I need Rosa to save the day.”

Soon, Michael found himself walking through the Manes house for the first time. It was just as big as he imagined, but he didn’t get a good look at it as he was led up the stairs to Alex’s bedroom. That seemed far more important than the rest of the house.

“Welcome to my room,” Alex said, throwing his arms out lightly. Michael looked around at the band posters that mixed oddly with the military-esque order of the rest of the room. “My dad and I made a compromise.”

“I see that,” Michael smiled, “You’re just an emo kid waiting for his time to shine, huh?”

Alex huffed a laugh and shook his head, grabbing Michael by the shirt and tugging him into the bathroom. The smile on both of their faces were prevalent as Alex pushed him into a chair that was already in the bathroom. A quick, nosey peek into the cabinets when Alex turned away to get scissors revealed makeup that had Michael’s mind wandering. He’d never seen Alex in makeup. He wondered when he wore that.

“Can I wash your hair?” Alex asked as he walked back in with a pair of scissors in his hands. Michael looked up at him and felt more obsessed than ever.

“You can do whatever you want to me,” Michael said helplessly. Alex smiled and leaned to grab shampoo from his shower. 

Alex put a folded up towel behind Michael’s neck and leaned his head into the sink. His long fingers combed out the knots in his hair as he drenched it with warm water. Michael’s eyes fell shut and he lost himself in the sensation. By the time Alex was working the shampoo into his hair, he was almost asleep. 

Michael was brought back to the living world by the sound of Alex’s laughter. He opened his eyes to see him above him, eyes shining. It was one of the most relaxed moments he’d ever seen Alex in. He was utterly carefree and comfortable. Michael was a fucking goner.

“You awake?” Alex asked softly. Michael nodded. “Lift your head for me, okay?”

Again, his eyes struggled to stay open as Alex snipped off bits of his hair. Rosa was always quick and efficient when cutting his hair, usually making him laugh and distracting him. Alex, on the other hand, was taking his sweet time. He’d press his body up against his, lean close, blow on his cheek to get fallen hair away, and disperse random touches wherever he could. He was beginning to think Alex could cut all of his hair off and he’d still say thanks.

Alex finished off the cut by combing his hands through his already curling hair. 

“There, you can wake up now,” Alex said, smiling at his work. Michael turned to look in the mirror and saw that it was definitely a bit shorter than he usually went and could anticipate that, once it dried, it would shrink.

“You think I’m still hot?”

“Yeah,” Alex chuckled, using his finger to curl a ringlet over Michael’s forehead. Oh, he was fucked.

“Can I ask you something?” Michael asked after a moment of both of them just staring in the mirror. Alex nodded. “Are you straight?”

Alex furrowed his eyebrows like he couldn’t believe he asked that question. “Why? You into me or something?”

His tone was bordering somewhere between joking and accusatory and it was confusing enough that Michael decided to reel it in completely. Or, as much as he could. It was hard. Too fucking hard.

“Just wondering since you can cut hair and what are we if not stereotypes,” Michael joked. Alex smiled again and rolled his eyes.

“Shut up,” he laughed, walking back into his bedroom. Michael stared at himself in the mirror for a little bit longer. He’d spent over two months now assuming Alex was into him and now he wasn’t sure if he was right. Had he made it up? Had he misread things? Had he seriously fallen for a straight guy? “Guerin, we get it, you’re into yourself!”

Right. Still here.

Michael went back into the bedroom, plastering on his smile so it wouldn’t seem like he was more confused than ever. Alex was laying on his big bed, his laptop propped against his knees.

“Wanna watch a movie?” he asked. Michael’s first thought was  _ yes _ , followed by  _ that’ll make it worse,  _ followed by  _ who cares. _

So, instead of being smart, Michael fell onto Alex’s bed and all but sunk into it. Alex tossed a ball that was on his nightstand and shut the lights off.

“Impressive,” Michael noted.

“Yeah, I know,” Alex laughed. Michael smiled at him helplessly all over again. “What do you wanna watch?”

“I don’t care.”

“Alright, then we’re watching Buffy and starting where I let off in the middle of an episode in the middle of season 5,” Alex threatened. He really didn’t seem to understand that Michael didn’t give a shit as long as he got to lay in his bed with him. 

“Okay.”

“You are so fucking tired,” Alex teased, clicking on the episode that he’d said, “Go to sleep.” Michael furrowed his eyebrows. “Dude, you were falling asleep the whole time in there. Just go to sleep.”

“You sure?” Michael asked, “You gonna wake me up when you wanna kick me out?”

“Yes,” Alex said, still grinning as if this was a normal thing you did with your friends. Which, for Michael, it kinda was, but Alex seemed different. Still, Michael took him up on the offer because he was self-destructive and couldn’t turn down the opportunity.

Michael woke up in the middle of the night to Alex sound asleep on the pillow beside him. Alex had pulled the blanket over them both sometime after he’d fallen asleep and just let him stay. His fingers twitched, eager to touch his hair or his lips or just any part of him. Instead, he kept his hands to himself and turned to face into the pillow, deciding smelling him was a lot safer than looking at him.

They both slept through Alex’s alarms.

All of them.

-

“Your hair looks nice.”

“I’ve done something extremely stupid and I don’t know what to do about it now, help me.”

Isobel blinked in surprise, but Michael didn’t really care that he’d passed on the greeting. It was finally Monday and he’d spent the weekend playing house with Alex, sleeping in the same bed and cooking together and being so fucking domestic that Michael wanted to throw up. This wasn’t real. Alex didn’t like him.

“I think I’m, like, in love or something,” Michael vented. Isobel’s eyes went even wider. “I-I spent the whole weekend with Alex. He cut my hair and we slept together and‒”

“You  _ what?” _

“Not like that! Just, in the same bed, and acted like fucking boyfriends minus all the kissing and the cuddling and, Izzy, I  _ want  _ the kissing and cuddling,” Michael vented, dropping his head in his hands. Isobel grabbed his arm.

“Okay, just breathe,” she instructed. He listened. “Look, have you talked to him about it?”

Michael squeezed his eyes shut. “No. Well, I asked him if he was straight, and he sort of avoided the question.”

“Maybe try asking something a little different?”

“Like what?”

“Like a date?”

Michael snapped his head up, probably looking as horrified as he felt. “I can’t do that. He gave me a whole ass place to go where I don’t feel like I’m bothering everyone. If I ask him out and he’s not into it, I ruin that. I don’t want to ruin that.”

“Listen, Michael, I think it’s worth it,” she said softly. He shook his head. “Look at you! I’ve never seen you like this over anyone. That feels like it’s worth it to me.”

Michael gulped and tried to shake off his nerves. It didn’t really work. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” she said, “And if kicks you out, then fuck him and you don’t want to stay with a guy who gets that offended.”

Michael felt like she was skipping a few steps in logic, but he also felt like having Alex for real sounded like a fucking fantastic thing. He’d been wanting to kiss him for so long it hurt.

So, that night, when Alex showed up at the shed again, Michael decided he needed to just get it over with or he was going to fucking drown. 

“Hey, can we talk?” Michael asked as normal as possible. Alex smiled that sweet smile and nodded. They both sat on the little bed, facing each other. “So… Promise me you won’t get upset?”

“Why would I?” Alex asked. Michael just stared at him until his smile started to drop. “Yeah, I promise.”

“Okay,” Michael breathed, “So… This whole weekend got me thinking really hard… I like you.” Michael looked away from him and then looked back. Alex’s face didn’t really change. “Like, I  _ like  _ like you. Like running into you that day kinda changed my entire life.”

Alex blinked a few times and turned his head away. Michael could feel his heart dropping. Oh. This is how it goes bad.

“This weekend…” Alex whispered, shaking his head with a scoff. “That was seriously the first time you noticed me?” Alex asked, voice carrying so much more emotion than it usually did that Michael flinched, “That day when you ran into me. You seriously had  _ never  _ noticed me before?”

Michael blinked a few times. “No?”

Alex scoffed, “You know, I used to see you every day and thought you were so fucking cool. For, like,  _ three years  _ I saw you at Bean Me Up, at the Crashdown, at the library, around town. I saw you all the time! I stared at you and admired you and tried my hardest to get your attention without having to actually talk to you because you were so fucking cool!”

Michael leaned away from him, eyebrows furrowed and more confused than ever. He was struggling to follow any of what was being said. How the hell had he been around Alex all that time and never noticed him?

“And when you started talking to me, flirting with me,” Alex went on, laughing dryly, “I  _ really  _ thought that you’d noticed me too. I had really fucking convinced myself that maybe you’d been doing what I was and just fucking  _ pining  _ like a dumbass for three years. I really thought that! I thought that someone as cool as you had somehow noticed me and had been waiting for your moment!”

“Alex, what‒”

“But no,” Alex huffed, “Because you’re too cool. Too self-absorbed and too fucking entitled to older women and rich girls and-and  _ saying  _ you like men but never being seen with one, then I show you I’m rich and suddenly you’re into me? Okay, Guerin.”

“Alex‒” Michael started, stopping that train of thought once Alex got up, “I don’t‒ I’m not‒ Alex!”

“You can still stay here,” Alex said, face still angry and hurt even though he was trying to use a calm tone, “I get you’re not faking that. But don’t fake being into me for my fucking money.”

Alex left him alone and he tried his damnedest to understand what Alex’s thought process had been. He wasn’t sure how he got from point A to point B, but he  _ was  _ sure Alex wasn’t open to hearing his explanation. Mainly because he didn’t have one. Alex had added so many fucking steps that didn’t even exist. How did one person complicate a stupid crush so much?

What the fuck was he missing?

-

“I’m totally over Alex.”

“Michael…”

“No, seriously, I am,” Michael insisted despite the fact that he was sitting in the bleachers at Alex’s football game, rambling over the noise that made up halftime, “I’ve had a few days to think about it and I’m glad he rejected me.”

“Seriously?” Isobel sighed, “I think if you guys just talked, then‒”

“No, I don’t wanna talk. He assumed so much shit about me without asking for clarification, I don’t wanna be with someone like that,” he said firmly. Maybe he still ached for his skin, maybe he still missed his smell, maybe he cried a couple of times, and maybe he couldn’t sleep in the shed anymore because it reminded him too much of Alex, but so what? 

“I think you’re overreacting,” Isobel said softly.

Michael shook his head. “I’m not the one overreacting. Alex freaked out on me for no reason. I don’t need that in my life. And good thing too.”

“...why is it a good thing?”

“Because now I can focus on a guy who actually wants me,” Michael said firmly, “Like the guy at the kissing booth.”

Isobel sighed loudly, “Michael, that was‒”

“I don’t care. He’s gotta still be out there. I want him. He wants me.” 

Michael didn’t look at her because he knew it’d be pity. He was tired of pity. He’d been getting it from her and Rosa all fucking week. Everyone went through tiny heartbreaks, he wasn’t special.

To prove that he wasn’t special, he stood up on the bleachers and whistled as loud as he could. He got a relatively decent-sized audience, including some of the football team, including Alex Manes, so he knew it’d spread to whoever it needed to reach. He threw on his smirk.

“Can I have your attention, please! Three months ago when I did a kissing booth at your fundraiser, one of you lovely men of Atherton kissed me behind the booth! I’ve been looking for you ever since!” he announced loudly. He heard a few whistles in response, fueling him more even as Isobel tugged on his pant leg. “So, I’d like to proposition you, whoever you are! Meet me at Bean Me Up Monday night! Let me get to know you! And, if he’s not here, everyone spread the word so I can find him!” 

Michael sat back onto the bleacher as people whistled and clapped for him as if he was that important. Sometimes, he surely felt he was. When it came to the people of Atherton, they felt he was too.

“What the fuck, Michael?” Isobel hissed.

“What?” he asked, “I was just getting shit done.”

“You could’ve gone about that in a better way.”

However, when Michael looked and saw Alex staring at him with slightly terrified eyes, he really thought he couldn’t have.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT BE  
> I hope you guys enjoy it! This has been a fun thing to write that started with me waking up with an idea and writing it right before work. Thanks for reading and commenting and supporting my chaos ❤️️

Alex didn't stop to catch his breath until he'd run all the way to the parking lot. 

He ran to his dad’s truck that he’d borrowed to get the fundraiser, bracing himself against the door. His eyes closed and he tried  _ really  _ hard not to think about what just happened. Actually, who was he kidding? That’s  _ all  _ he could think about. Soft lips, soft hair, hard  _ something else.  _

Alex Manes had never kissed a man before in his life and now he just fucking went all in. After watching Michael for years, he saw his chance and he fucking took it. How could he stop thinking about it?

Alex touched his lips and had to take a deep breath to stop himself from running back. He wanted to so badly. He wanted to kiss him until he couldn't breathe, until his lips were numb, until he tasted his name on Michael's tongue.

It was insanity, really. Ever since he'd seen Isobel's post advertising that Michael would be here doing a kissing booth, Alex had been planning. He never thought he'd actually go through with it, though. He thought it was all fake plans that he'd never do like how he could commit the perfect murder or successfully steal from Walmart. But no. He'd heard Isobel say he was taking a break, he saw Isobel leave the booth, and he saw his opportunity.

But now he dealt with the possibility that Michael might know who he was. Or, worse, that he  _ didn't _ know. That Michael had just kissed a perfect stranger like the world was ending and Alex was the only one who had all the pieces of the puzzle. 

What the fuck had he just done?

-

“Sorry.”

Alex stared, partially frozen in shock as the one and only Michael Guerin stood in front of him. He waited in baited silence for what felt like an eternity as he waited for Michael to point out that he was the one who kissed him, to tease him for it. Instead, Michael looked him up and down. His eyes hovered on the school’s emblem on his chest and Alex watched his smirk grow into place.

“Sorry, do I know you?” Michael asked. Alex felt his heart plummet, though he wasn’t sure why. He didn’t really want Michael to know it was him. Or maybe he did. He decided he would hate either option because he regretted doing it. Why couldn’t he get his first real kiss like any other guy? Ask someone out, go on a date, kiss them at their doorstep, that kind of stuff. Why did he have to be a creep?

“Uh… No, I don’t think so.”

“That’s too bad,” Michael said. That caught Alex off guard. Maybe Michael  _ had  _ noticed him around. 

“Right, well… See you around, I guess,” Alex fumbled out, quickly exiting himself from the situation before he brutally embarrassed himself. 

Alex stood outside with his drink and tried his best to calm down. Why did he have to do that? Why did he have to be so stupid? More importantly, why couldn’t he kiss him again when he wasn’t blindfolded?

“Hey, Alex!”

Alex looked up to see cheerleader Lucy Geraldo jogging over to him. She was pretty, he could admit that, but she wasn’t his type. She was missing a pretty crucial piece of identity to fit his type. However, that didn’t stop her or her friends from flirting with him. Maybe it was his fault. He  _ had  _ made out with Hannah Kay at that party sophomore year. That was what had confirmed to him that he was super gay. It also confirmed to everyone else that he was absolutely not.

“I was just thinking about you,” she said, smiling as she pulled her thick hair over her shoulder, “I was wondering if you were going to Hannah’s party this weekend?”

Alex gave a tight smile and chose a sturdy lie. “Nah, I have to study.”

“Oh,” she pouted, “Maybe we can hang out some other time?” 

“Maybe,” he said. She smiled and waved at him and he hauled ass to the Crashdown. 

Which would’ve been great if he didn’t run into Michael  _ again.  _ He shouldn’t have been surprised, he knew Michael had a  _ thing  _ going on with Rosa for years now, but it felt like an extra layer of bullshit. Couldn’t he just enjoy his misery in peace?

“I’m sorry, he flirts with everything that has a pulse,” Liz huffed after Michael left.

“It’s fine,” Alex said, shrugging his shoulders. He thought about coming out to Liz if only so he could have someone to talk to about it. He was resigned to his fantasies and they were becoming unbearable, but he didn’t know how to begin. “You think they’re hooking up?”

“Who, Michael and Rosa? Absolutely not,” Liz laughed. Alex raised an eyebrow. “I can’t say much about what’s going on because it’s not my place, but they’re just friends.”

Alex firmly decided he liked the idea of staying in denial that Michael Guerin wasn’t sleeping around like everyone said.

“Okay.”

-

Alex left the library with a smile on his face and the desire to jump and scream.

He just flirted with a guy. Like, a guy who was right there and could see his face and flirted back. It was  _ easy.  _ Michael was  _ interested.  _ Or, he at least seemed so. Alex wasn’t sure why exactly someone like that would be interested in someone like him. Maybe he was just flirting because he could.

It didn’t matter. Alex was  _ happy.  _ He felt  _ confident.  _ That was so rare. Suddenly, he was really tired of hiding.

Alex made his way to the Crashdown, still hyper and high on the fact that a whole ass man had flirted with him. He even let himself think that maybe Michael would’ve kissed him if he saw his face. Hell, maybe Michael even had been watching him too. 

“Liz, can I talk to you?” he asked. She looked up from to him and then over to her dad who waved her onto her break. The two of them walked to the back of the cafe and sat in a booth. He looked at her and, for the first time, said it out loud. “I’m gay.”

Liz’s eyes widened and her head moved back in shock. “Really?”

“Yes,” Alex breathed, smiling, “I’m gay. But you’re the first person I’ve told, so please don’t say anything just yet.”

“Of course I won’t say anything, oh my god, I’m so glad you told me,” Liz said, the shock quickly being replaced with a smile, “I-I don’t even know what to say.”

“You don’t need to say anything, I just needed to  _ say  _ it,” he told her. He left out the part that he was super excited because he just flirted with a boy in public.

“That makes sense. I’m proud of you,” she said. He smiled wider.

This felt good.

-

Alex flirted with Michael the next time he saw him at Bean Me Up. He couldn’t help himself. 

He felt those beautiful eyes on him the entire time and he didn’t know how he’d ever gone without feeling them. He was more than convinced now that Michael had noticed him before that first time they spoke. He was just too smooth, too cool, too perfect. He had to have prepared.

He was high on life, on being out, on being  _ noticed _ .

-

“How long has he been sitting there?”

“Four hours.”

“Jesus Christ, why didn’t you call me?”

“My phone is dead!”

Rosa cursed under her breath and made her way to Michael Guerin. Alex had been watching Michael since he’d been there for only about ten minutes. He’d been methodically shooting the same four rubber bands into the same cup over and over and over. He was wearing what seemed to be four layers of clothes and his eyes were empty. It was the most out of it Alex had ever seen a person. It was particularly weird to see  _ him  _ like that. He was always so full of life, so  _ present.  _ Alex didn’t understand.

Rosa hugged him and brought him food. Every movement Michael made was in slow motion, still seeming not all there. Alex tried to imagine a time he felt like that, but he couldn’t. Michael seemed to be completely removed from himself.

“Can you wash his clothes when you’re done down here?” Rosa asked Liz who nodded.

“Hey, Rosa, wait,” Alex said before he could stop himself, “What’s going on?”

Rosa sighed and clearly seemed to be debating what she should say or shouldn’t say. She settled on, “He’s just not himself right now.”

Sometime in between it all, Michael looked up and made eye contact. Usually, he would smile. Usually, he would say something witty. Today he seemed to not even register that he made eye contact.

“Liz,” Alex prodded after Rosa had dragged Michael upstairs, “What’s that all about?”

“I shouldn’t say,” Liz hesitated.

“I wanna help though,” Alex nearly whined. 

Liz waited a moment and looked around a few times before leaning in close. 

“He kinda doesn’t have a place to live,” she said softly. Alex furrowed his eyebrows and sat back. How did someone like that not have a place to live?

Whenever Alex thought of the word  _ homeless,  _ he imagined people on the street who hadn’t bathed in years. He imagined old men with beards and shopping carts. He imagined… anything but a high schooler who had a truck and friends and a sexy smile. It didn’t compute.

“I don’t understand,” Alex said. Liz just gave a sad little smile.

“I don’t know much. I just know he’s been through the foster system and it didn’t go well,” she said. Alex nodded.

The next few days Alex spent padding out his shed. It was already pretty set for someone to stay there, but he decided to add another, thicker blanket and made sure everything was clean.

For once, he had nothing by confidence as he went to talk to Michael. This wasn’t about him this time.

-

“Who do you think carved those initials?”

Alex tilted his head as he took in the heart that had “ _ H.R. + K.C. ‘54”  _ written inside it. Ever since he’d found this time, he’d brainstormed on who those two could’ve possibly been and why they spent their time in the shed. He always came up with a different story. A married couple who built it, a ten-year-old girl in love with her neighbor, a boy who was about to go to war and wanted to make sure there was something permanent, an elderly couple who wanted to reminisce. 

“I don’t know. Could be anyone,” Alex said. Michael hummed softly which easily dragged Alex’s attention onto him. He was laying in bed, a blanket draped around him. He looked comfortable and like he was meant to be there. It made Alex’s heart skip a beat.

Things with Michael felt so comfortable. They’d been doing this for almost a month now, hanging out alone and just  _ being.  _ He could say anything without fear and so could Michael. He’d gotten to know him in a way he hadn’t expected and he liked him even more now. He liked the way he trusted him, he liked the way he joked around, he liked the way he had told Alex things that seemed so heavy and yet he made them seem light. Hell, he even liked the way he didn’t really flirt anymore. He was real around him. Mask off.

Fuck, Alex was in deep.

“Maybe it stands for Henry Rollins and Kevin Costner,” Michael began softly. Alex snorted, but let him continue. “Star-crossed lovers who couldn’t be seen with each other during the day, so instead they came here at night to be together.”

“Romantic,” Alex said.

“Very.”

Alex stayed in there for a little while longer, laying on the floor and thinking about what his life had become. He wasn’t sure how he’d become the type of person to provide food and shelter and warmth. He liked being that person. He liked being that person for Michael.

When he looked over to him, he saw that he was sound asleep. He was gorgeous when he slept. Well, he was gorgeous always.

Alex quietly left the shed and tried his best not to focus on how full his heart seemed.

-

Oh, how could life possibly be better than this?

Alex had mixed feelings the minute he let Michael into his house. He saw the way Michael looked at all the expensive shit his father put on display, he noticed the way that had suddenly activated his flirting again. Of course, that sort of got confusing during the haircut. More confusing when Michael outright asked if he was straight. Things were very confusing.

But staring at him while he was asleep just a few inches away? There was nothing confusing about that.

The room was shrouded in darkness and Alex had already tugged the blanket over them both. He knew he should’ve woken Michael up so there would be no confusion. But the problem was that he was already sure he’d fucked up, so why not fuck up more?

Slowly, Alex reached his hand out. He moved slow and careful, gently dragging the back of his finger over Michael’s jaw. He was tempted to just put his whole hand on his cheek, but he didn’t. He already had done that when they’d kissed all that time ago. He knew what he felt like. 

He touched him for a few seconds before Michael’s face scrunched up in the most adorable way, but Alex couldn’t watch because he was too busy snatching his hand away and pretending to be asleep. Michael made a confused little noise as he woke up. He didn’t move for a second, but then he did and when Alex peeked his eye open he saw his face buried in the pillow.

He wanted this forever.

The whole weekend went that way. Bonding, talking, being close. They slept in the same bed, they ate the same food, Michael used his shower.

“You know, I knew you were rich, but you’re like…  _ really  _ rich,” Michael commented late on Saturday night. Alex had shown him how to make pad thai even though he was sure Michael wasn’t paying attention.

“Old, dirty money,” Alex said with a shrug.

“What does your dad even  _ do?”  _ Michael asked. Alex looked at him, watched as he continued to look around. 

“He’s military, but he has a lot of stocks. It’s all shares my great, great grandad had, passed onto him,” Alex explained. Michael nodded with an impressed look, giving him that flirty little smile.

“So you’re gonna have all that one day?” Michael asked. Alex felt his stomach tighten up in a way similar to when Michael had started flirting after registering the emblem on his uniform.

“Yeah.”

“That’s pretty hot,” Michael laughed, taking another bite. Alex changed the subject.

They climbed into the same bed that night, they whispered to each other, they slept in, they laid in bed for hours. It was so comfortable that Alex forgot. He let himself forget, he let himself focus on  _ this.  _ He just wanted so badly for this to be real. That a boy like  _ that  _ liked someone like  _ him. _

And then Michael sat him down.

“This whole weekend got me thinking really hard… I like you.”

//

“This is a bad idea.” 

“Why? I think I’m fucking brilliant.”

Michael ignored the way Rosa stared at him, eyeing him like she was super worried. Which she probably was. She seemed to  _ only  _ worry when it came to things about him. Still, he ignored it and continued to make sure he looked hot enough to meet the man of his dreams.

“Yeah, I know you do,” she said, “But whoever kissed you might not want to meet you somewhere so public.”

“It’s not that public though. That’s why I chose Bean Me Up, it’s small and can’t be too crowded,” Michael pointed out. Rosa sighed.

“Maybe, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t going to crowd anyway. You advertised it and there are probably going to be people who are going to lie. Either to make fun of you or to trick you. I just don’t think this is smart and that’s coming from me,” Rosa said. Michael didn’t respond. He didn’t know how to.

It was true, he had advertised it. After loudly announcing it at the football game, he decided to be a bit more specific and got Isobel to make a post similar to the original kissing booth one. He put out a call for the guy who kissed him to meet him after school and that all he had to do was tell him what they talked about before the kiss.

“Michael,” Rosa said firmly when he turned around. She grabbed his arm and made him look at her. He did if only because she never said his name like that. “You are being reckless. What is going on? Are you okay? What happened?”

He stared at her for a minute and tried to find a quip about how she wasn’t his therapist. He found it hard to do that. She was always there for him and he was sort of being a dick in general. Michael took a deep breath, calming himself down enough to feel that dull ache in his chest resurface.

“I told Alex that I liked him and he freaked out on me about how I was just saying that because he has money,” Michael said, “I don’t even know why he’d even think that and I just… I need a good distraction.”

“And you think finding someone who kissed you in secret will do the trick?” Rosa asked. Michael shrugged.

“Worth a shot.”

“Have you thought about asking why Alex thought that? I’m sure there’s a reason. He’s a tame kid,” she said. He shook his head.

“Nah, I don’t want to make it worse. I’m just gonna put it behind me,” he said firmly. She gave him an unsure smile.

“Okay. Please be safe.”

“I will.”

-

So maybe Rosa had a point. 

Between 4 PM and 7 PM, seven different guys had come up to fuck with him. It was a nice, firm kick to the ego. The first hour, people had gathered around out of curiosity to see what guy had kissed him in such a weird way. It dwindled and dwindled as time went on which only made Michael feel even more deflated. He just wanted someone. Was that so hard to ask?

“Hey, I gotta go. My mom’s gonna throw a fit if I stay any later,” Isobel said around 8:30. Bean Me Up was only going to be open for 30 more minutes. That meant 30 more minutes before he was forced to face the reality of rejection. “Are you gonna be okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” he promised. She gave him a sisterly smile and leaned to give him a hug.

“Let me know if he shows. And, if he doesn’t, come over. We can watch romcoms and eat ice cream and Mom can just get over it, okay?” she said. Michael smiled and nodded.

“Absolutely.”

When the clock hit 8:45 and he was the only one left in the shop, he was thinking about just heading to Isobel’s anyway. Leaving early would be better than being completely stood up. But then again, he’d already made it this far.

“We close in five,” one of the two baristas left said as the clock struck 8:55, sitting a full to-go drink in front of him with a kind smile, “On the house.”

“Why? Am I that pathetic?” he joked. Sort of. She still laughed.

“Well, no. You actually gave us a ton of free advertisement, so thanks for the nearly $300 sales jump today,” she said. Michael huffed a laugh and raised his drink to her.

“No problem,” he said, “I’ll head out so I’m not a dick.” 

“Well, wait, you still have four more minutes,” she told him, “You never know what could happen.”

So Michael waited.

8:57

8:58

8:59

“Can I sit here?”

Michael looked up to see Alex standing there. He looked fucking beautiful as always which was just annoying. Was he here to rub it in?

“I’m saving it for someone,” Michael said. Alex took a deep breath and nodded.

“Yeah, I know.” And then he sat down.

Michael stared at him for a few seconds before he got what he was implying. But what he was implying was impossible. Complete and utter bullshit. Michael shook his head slowly.

“What?” he breathed, eyebrows tugged together. Alex shrugged one shoulder.

“Now that I’ve seen you shirtless, I’m second-guessing the cub label. Maybe an otter in the making? Not sure,” Alex said. Michael felt like he couldn’t breathe. What the fuck?  _ What the fuck?  _ “They’re closed. Drive me home?”

“I… I don’t…” Michael fumbled out. This didn’t make sense. Why was Alex here? He rejected him. He didn’t like him. He wasn’t… This wasn’t…  _ What? _ “How?”

“I’ll tell you,” Alex promised, looking so sincere, “I promise.”

Michael stood slowly, his head spinning and he had to grab the table to balance himself. Alex was mad at him. Alex didn’t know him. Sure, Alex had the cheekbones and the physique and the lips and the  _ voice  _ and  _ fuck. _

“I don’t fucking get it,” Michael said as they stood beside his truck. Bean Me Up had locked their doors and closed the blinds to give them their privacy. Alex was holding his drink since he was too lost to comprehend.

“I talked to Liz and she kinda explained to me that I was being irrational. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions and I definitely shouldn’t have hidden this from you. I should’ve just talked to you and I’m sorry for being selfish,” Alex said sincerely. It sounded way more sincere than when he’d freaked out on him. But, still, he couldn’t figure it out. He almost didn’t even care about the rejection anymore.

“I don’t understand how it was you,” Michael said, shaking his head, “I would’ve known. I mean, I  _ should’ve _ . I hung around you, I heard you speak, I smelled you. How didn’t I know?” He paused for a moment. “You’re not fucking with me, are you?”

Alex gave a tight little smile and shook his head. 

“I wasn’t out. I’m still not, not really,” he sighed, “Look, when I told you I’d been idolizing you for years… I wasn’t lying. When I saw my opportunity, I took it and didn’t even think twice about what it meant. Then when we started hanging out, I was in too deep and I didn’t know how to bring it up. Then I got confused and, well, that ended badly.”

Michael rubbed his hand over his face, still trying to make sense of it all. “So, you  _ don’t  _ think I only want you for money?”

Alex visibly cringed. “I am so, so sorry for accusing you of that. I guess I just didn’t think you could like me and you mentioned the weekend and over the weekend you’d mentioned my dad’s money and, I don’t know, it was just a lot happening in my mind. Which isn’t an excuse. That was shitty of me and I will make it up to you.”

“Yeah,” Michael breathed, “I guess… I guess I’m just still…”

Alex sighed loudly and placed the cup on the hood of the truck before stepping into Michael’s space. He grabbed his cheeks and he kissed him. It wasn’t as wild as that one in the booth, but it was still a kiss from Alex. And then it made sense.

Michael went to push in closer, but Alex pulled away.

“Not here,” he whispered, “I just wanted to show you I’m not lying.”

Michael nodded. He knew he wasn’t. He’d been dreaming about that kiss and he’d been dreaming about Alex and suddenly it just was all one and it was all real and it was all here. Again, he felt like he couldn’t breathe, but for an entirely different reason.

“Can we go to the shed?” Alex asked. Michael gulped softly and nodded. There was nothing he wanted more. He was allowed to touch Alex. He could have that.

The drive to Alex’s house was very full of Alex apologizing in length. He explained that he was just overwhelmed and confused, but he should’ve talked it out first. He told him that the kiss was a spur of the moment and he told him that he’d been crushing on him forever. He confirmed that the weekend had meant a lot to him too. And he told him that he was gay.

“You’re only the second person I’ve told,” Alex said, “So… I’m still trying to figure it all out.”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to come out until you’re ready,” Michael assured him once he found his words.

“I mean, I kinda don’t have a choice now. People are gonna want to know if you found your guy,” Alex said, taking a sip of Michael’s coffee. That did things to his mind that something as simple as sharing a cup shouldn’t do.

“Fuck them, it’s our business. I can just tell Isobel and Rosa that I found him, but not elaborate on who and then everyone else can fuck off,” Michael decided as he drove the bumpy terrain that led to the shed from the back way. Alex huffed a laugh.

“You can tell Isobel and Rosa,” he said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. They love you, so they deserve to know that I’m not fucking torturing you. Or, at least I hope not.” 

“You aren’t.”

When they got to the shed, Michael sent both Isobel and Rosa a text to tell them how it went. Then he focused on Alex which was easy.

The tone between them changed as they got into the sanctuary of the shed. It felt slightly tainted from the last time they’d been there, but then again, not really. It was just that they were alone now.

“I’m sorry,” Alex said again.

“Stop apologizing,” Michael said, slowly moving closer. He wanted to get his hands on him. He wanted to kiss him again. He wanted to make up for three months of being lost. 

“I’m not experienced,” Alex warned as Michael gently grabbed his hips.

“I don’t care.”

“I’m sorry,” Alex said one more time. Michael huffed and shook his head, wrapping his arms around Alex and tilting his head for a kiss.

The kiss was slow and deliberate, taking it one step at a time. Michael wanted to soak in it this time. He wanted to be sure without a doubt that this was Alex and that this was his. This was his choice.

Alex wove his fingers into his hair and his lips parted, his tongue sliding over Michael’s in a way that was far too confident for a boy who claimed to have no experience. His hands moved up and his elbows rested on Michael’s shoulders so he could cradle his head closer. This made sense. This was coming home.

Michael pushed his shirt up to feel his skin. It was soft and warm and inviting. They made their way to the tiny bed and shared it for the first time. They fit well. His hand moved down a little bit to the hem of his jeans only to be stopped by Alex’s hand on his wrist.

“Not today, okay?” Alex whispered. Michael nodded easily. Happily, even. This was new. Slow. He could do slow.

“No problem,” he said, “No pressure.”

Alex stayed the night in the shed that night. Michael finally got his kisses and his cuddles. He finally got Alex.

As he drifted off to sleep with Alex in his arms, he thought about those initials on the wall. He decided that the story didn’t matter. It was two people who loved each other and this shed meant something to them. He made a mental note to add another heart.

_ A.M. + M.G.  _

**Author's Note:**

> also on my tumblr: spaceskam


End file.
